“If uncertainty is unacceptable to you, it turns into fear. If it is perfectly acceptable, it turns into increased aliveness, alertness, and creativity.”
-Eckhart Tolle
I should be better at tolerating uncertainty. It is something I practice each time I begin a new painting, and throughout the whole painting process. During this frightening time, I have to say that my ability to tolerate uncertainty is being sorely tested.
“Last Day VII” Watercolor and pencil on paper 12″x9″ $395
There is uncertainty about how long and how far the virus will spread, about what damage the economy will sustain and about what life will look like after it is all over. We tend to forget the daily uncertainties. Life can be random and surprising. No one expects to be stricken with job loss, disease, or heartbreak, though these things happen all the time. What is different about this period is that the likelihood of one of these scenarios is increased for almost everyone.
The world is experiencing a pandemic on a scale we’ve never seen before. Similarly, each painting I make, I’ve never seen before. Each work has its own motivations, form, progression through problems and resolution.
Artists are often asked whether we visualize how a painting will look upon completion. I do not. I begin with an idea or emotion and often a set of parameters. Those parameters might be a color palette or an emphasis on shape or line. The way the elements of idea and form coalesce is the unknown and the adventure of painting.
One thing that helps me hang on during the painting process, as well as during this moment in history, is trying to remain positive, or at least realistic. Conversely, when I focus on negative emotions and problems I can easily become overwhelmed. If I focus on the parts of the painting that I like, I can try to repeat or emphasize them.
Taking action also provides a feeling that we are doing something to help others. I’ve been cleaning our home and sharing information via social media and telephone. I’ve also decided to volunteer to deliver meals via Meals on Wheels People. All these things function twofold: they help me feel more in control in a tenuous situation, and they help others by, hopefully, helping to contain the spread of this pandemic.
Art and Literature are also a vital remedy to the saggy spirit that we all must feel. Making and viewing art is one of my favorite activities. I’ve loved seeing the outpouring of visual art that friends and strangers are sharing online. Some of it makes me think, some of it makes me feel and some art makes me appreciate the rich and precious beauty that surrounds us. I also fall back to books I’ve read that became like old friends.
One such book that I was reminded of this morning is To the Wedding by John Berger. You can read a review of the book here: https://gerryco23.wordpress.com/2017/02/04/rereading-john-berger-to-the-wedding/. I highly recommend this beautiful tragedy, as much for its poignant writing as for its message. One particular passage that has stuck with me since I read the book in 1996 talked about how our daily perception is that we are safe. That we live in an age of medical miracles, but when something unknown (such as AIDS in the book or COVID-19 now) we realize that we are all just clinging to life, like puffins on a cliff.
How do I know when I read To the Wedding? Our book group has been reading together since 1993. I have a list of every book we’ve read since, and most of the average scores. If you’d like to get some ideas for what to read next, you can download the list here. We choose our books by committee. Most are recent fiction (or were when we chose them!) Then at our meetings, we rate the books on a scale of 1 – 10, one being worse than Popular Mechanics and 10 being your top score. The scores you see on the chart are an average of all voting members. Let me know if you see books you’ve also enjoyed, or find a new one to read.
All this rambling is to say: Art is Important. Perhaps now, more than ever.
Even though I have had to cancel workshops and the economy will make painting sales less probable, I know that I will be able to adapt. I am so fortunate to be able to work through this period. I have been taking time to develop new skills and experiment. That time is often in short supply with a busy teaching and exhibition schedule. I have also cut back on entering shows, which can be a big financial drain.
What are you doing to boost your morale, and that of others, during this sweeping change in our daily lives?
Thank you for helping us cope. and I love your book list! I will go through and choose some new titles to get as e-books from the library. Stay safe and carry on!
Thank you Ruth. You continue to impress me with your talents and insights. During this initial time of self-isolation, my husband and I have been focused on essentials: food, meds, and we’re lucky to have shelter and a loving relationship. In addition I do physical therapy and we both practice Turtle Longevity Qigong daily–two standing forms, two sitting meditations. I’m re-assembling some shattered pieces, since knowing that if I develop this virus I will probably die or be down to 20-30% O2 capacity. (I have emphysema and asthma/ca. 50% lung capacity.) I’m welcoming the moment to be back in the studio once whole. Ideas are flooding in. Daily I’m once again reminded that I only have today, this moment. Be kind.
Your comparison between the uncertainty of the creative process and our uncertain times was mind opening and very inspiring. Thank you for the book list, I have been hoping for recommendations and here they are in your blog!
Hi Ruth
You’re so great at writing! Good point about the uncertainty of painting compared with the uncertainty of what’s going on. I’m freaking out all over again as I see how long this may possibly last.
I would love to be a guest on your blog. I’m personally keeping in touch with all my students and learning more about social media and creating demonstration videos.
I’m also working on new pieces.
I appreciate reading your blog and seeing your lovely work.
Ruth,
I have not painted in over 9 months as I have been dealing with a vision change, which has affected many areas of my life one of them color perception! About a week ago I picked up my watercolors and started on a journey back to painting. I am currently surveying any painters I know to come up with a palette of realistic green colors. What yellows and blues are you mixing for pleasing greens.? I have received very varied feedback. And would like to know your go to colors. Yes I would be interested in an online workshop!
Thanks so much for this spot-on posting.
I’ve not been attracted to on line classes but I am willing to try, and since I have wanted to attend a class with you for quite awhile, this is an opportunity to give it a go. I can’t imagine trying to weather this without painting…
If you haven’t read Pema Chodron when things fall apart or living with uncertainty, well now seems like a good time! Im rereading them. Be well. May you be free from suffering.
I will also download your reading list; I am an avid library book reader, and now I’m wrestling with how to read library ebooks–hoops to jump through to download something on my ipad, but I will figure it out. I was feel helpless too for the first few days but then I, like you, starting connecting more with artists and friends–both online and over the actual phone. One hour conversations can be very stimulating—because it seems like we have “all the time in the world” suddenly. We were all rushing around so busily, but maybe this is a wakeup call to slow things down and listen and dialogue with others. Thanks for putting things in perspective. It helps!
Dear Ruth, Thank you so much for this list. I noticed that many of your favorites are my favorites! I am busy painting and am so happy to have that outlet for all my various reactions to the present health crisis. Take care! And wonderful that you are doing Meals on Wheels. You are a very special person.
Sincerely,Collin
Thanks Ruth,
I take long walks everyday and have been trying to capture the emerging beauty of spring on my iPhone camera. The intention is to find painting inspiration but so far that inspiration and motivation has been slow in coming! I have made a conscious decision to cut down on the time i spend glued to the news. Everything was getting to me and it was showing up in some truly grim artwork! I just ordered new to me art supplies and am grateful to have this time to experiment. Who knows what will happen but why not try?
I miss my family and friends terribly but I find connecting with friends via whatever way possible, is absolutely therapeutic. Some of us are now doing virtual Happy Hour and it definitely helps!
Stay safe and well. I just learned a friend has tested positive and now realize this is hitting home closer sooner than I anticipated.
Keep going with your blog!??
thank you for the encouragement and the book list Ruth. Today is kinda crummy- not sure why but I am sure tomorrow will be better. Trying to paint but not too enthusiastic. The book list will help!
I enjoyed the nwsexhibition paintings. You have a way of attracting the viewer into further study of the nuances within your painting, Petroglyph. To me there seems to be a haunting motion within, a sense of passage of time. This exhibitions display truly show off the pale Ted talented painters who live “next door” as nations.
I would be interested in an online class. Please share details how this would be done and the time element involved.
Thank you Ruth! Your writing and insights are wonderful and I find it very helpful. I particularly liked the comparison between the uncertainty process of painting and the uncertainty of what is going on. As we proceed and eventually get through this everything will change and we, individually and the art world collectively, need to take our time and adapt. My faith also provides me with patience and strength.
I appreciated your book list. I have been trying to do some painting. Currently working on one I am calling “The Rose of Hope Emerges After Pandemic”…not finished as yet.
Stay well and thank you again for your inspiration.
Really good post, Ruth.
“…clinging to life, like puffins on a cliff.” That part of the quote is spot-in. I’ve been wanting to take a class from you for years but the timing hasn’t worked out for me yet. I enjoy on-line art classes and would be ecstatic if you did an on-line class.
Thank you, Ruth! Your Ramblings and Readings are so timely and so appreciated!
So unbusy yet it took until 04/08 to read this. Before I forget, an online course would be most welcome. I hope you give it some serious consideration. Otherwise you, and your words, and your work are amazing as usual. Be well.
Hi Lorraine,
I know how it goes 🙂 Sometimes I skip an email until I have a better time to read it, then forget!